Review: If You Stay by Courtney Cole
If You Stay (Beautifully Broken #1)
by: Courtney Cole
Publication Date: Feb. 5, 2013
Publisher: Lakehouse Press
Genre: Contemporary Romance
Age Group: New Adult
Source: Purchased for Nook
Page Count: 220 pages
Order Links: Amazon | B&N
My Rating: 4/5 stars
24-year old Pax Tate is an asshole.
Seriously.
He’s a tattooed, rock-hard bad-boy with a bad attitude to match.
But he’s got his reasons.
His mother died when Pax was seven, leaving a hole in his heart filled with guilt although he doesn’t understand why. What he does know is that he and his dad are left alone and with more issues than they can count.
As Pax grew up, he tried to be the kid his father always wanted; the perfect golden boy, but it didn’t work. His dad couldn’t overcome his grief long enough to notice and Pax couldn’t keep up the impossible perfect façade.
So he slipped far, far from it.
Now, he uses drugs and women to cope with the ugliness, the black void that he doesn’t want to deal with. If he pretends that the emptiness isn’t there, then it isn’t, right?
Wrong.
And it’s never more apparent than when he meets Mila.
Sweet, beautiful Mila Hill is the fresh air to his hardened frown, the beauty to his ugly heart. He doesn’t know how to not hurt her, but he quickly realizes that he’s got to figure it out because he needs her to breathe.
When memories of his mother’s death resurface from where he’s repressed them for so long, Mila is there to catch him when the guilt starts making sense. Mila is the one…the one who can save him from his broken troubled heart; from his issues, from the emptiness.
But only if he can stop being an asshole long enough to allow it.
He knows that. And he’s working on it.
But is that enough to make her stay?
Seriously.
He’s a tattooed, rock-hard bad-boy with a bad attitude to match.
But he’s got his reasons.
His mother died when Pax was seven, leaving a hole in his heart filled with guilt although he doesn’t understand why. What he does know is that he and his dad are left alone and with more issues than they can count.
As Pax grew up, he tried to be the kid his father always wanted; the perfect golden boy, but it didn’t work. His dad couldn’t overcome his grief long enough to notice and Pax couldn’t keep up the impossible perfect façade.
So he slipped far, far from it.
Now, he uses drugs and women to cope with the ugliness, the black void that he doesn’t want to deal with. If he pretends that the emptiness isn’t there, then it isn’t, right?
Wrong.
And it’s never more apparent than when he meets Mila.
Sweet, beautiful Mila Hill is the fresh air to his hardened frown, the beauty to his ugly heart. He doesn’t know how to not hurt her, but he quickly realizes that he’s got to figure it out because he needs her to breathe.
When memories of his mother’s death resurface from where he’s repressed them for so long, Mila is there to catch him when the guilt starts making sense. Mila is the one…the one who can save him from his broken troubled heart; from his issues, from the emptiness.
But only if he can stop being an asshole long enough to allow it.
He knows that. And he’s working on it.
But is that enough to make her stay?
-goodreads.com description
This is not a YA novel, but a New Adult one instead. I desperately needed a break from paranormal/supernatural and decided to read a fun, fast read.
What a beautiful, heartbreaking book. It makes sense the series is called Beautifully Broken. Pax is seriously a jerk for the beginning of the book. He is a user of both drugs and women and you find yourself both disgusted with him and heartbroken that he feels so negatively about himself and his life.
Mila Hill, is the complete opposite. She is sweet and open to love. She has a few parental issues that she is learning to overcome, but nothing in the way of what Pax has to deal with. She saves Pax's life as he almost overdoses on the beach. They are drawn to each other from the day she visits his hospital room.
I love that this book is told from both Mila and Pax's POV. We get Mila's sweet, caring narrative, and then we get Pax's rough, at times vulgar take.
Overall, this book is about overcoming some pretty heavy ordeals and about being able to find love and forgiveness.
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